by Catie Disabato and anna dorn Over the summer, we — Anna and Catie — attended a birthday party at the rooftop bar at the Ace Hotel in Downtown Los Angeles. To leave no space for any kind of misunderstanding, Catie said, “We met on Tinder.” David paused, trying to reconcile this bit of information, and came to the following conclusion: “It’s so great that you can make such good friends on Tinder! “We met on Tinder for dating.”A few weeks later, Anna invited her friend Lauren to get brunch with, as she phrased it, “my girlfriend and some of her friends.” Anna thought by using the word “girlfriend” she had adequately defined the relationship for Lauren, but during the course of the brunch conversation, Lauren asked (twice! ”Sometimes it’s actually super funny to watch acquaintances squirming to apologize after assuming we’re sisters, or to watch Mystery Method rejects stammer, searching for a cool-sounding answer to “we’re actually on a date with each other right now.” We walk away from these encounters in a position of power, which gives us swagger, and the ability to laugh at our would-be oppressors for their idiotic insistence on ignoring what should be obvious.David, a bearded straight guy, started talking to Catie, learning in close to listen and reaching out to touch her arm when he spoke; casual, obvious flirting. Sometimes, though, these encounters make us feel like an out of sync You Tube video, an image of a person’s mouth moving and the audio appearing seconds too late. I normally Internet stalk my online dating connections pretty thoroughly. But life had gotten busy, and for a few days I was swiping right on Coffee Meets Bagel without my normal due diligence. Both seemed nice, but I was having trouble keeping them...The solution that our culture has developed to this widespread confusion is the standard coming out: a major declaration of sexual orientation.In this popular narrative, the coming out happens only once, creating a boundary between person’s life before (suppression, lies) and after (freedom, honesty).
The audience for this narrative is straight people (as in the fable, gay people can smell their own), and after listening to the coming out, they get to be the hero, accepting the gay people unquestioningly, a Good Ally, woke a.f.
Wait for them to come to you.”The advice came from my dear friend Jennifer, who has a stepfamily of her own and understands that it takes time and patience to blend and bond. Months later, in a quiet moment, I told the girls as much, and let them know it’s OK to have any range of feelings about all this.
But life had gotten busy, and for a few days I was swiping right on Coffee Meets Bagel without my normal due diligence. Both seemed nice, but I was having trouble keeping them... Like a puppy dog, I wanted to cuddle up to them and play, but I remembered her advice not to overwhelm them, so I pretended like this was all no big deal, and tried to find the feline inside.
March 27, 2017 (The Public Discourse) -- When Christian rock star Trey Pearson announced he was coming out of the closet and separating from his wife and their two children after seven and a half years of marriage, he said that his wife had been his “biggest supporter” and that “she just hugged me and cried and said how proud of me she was.” If this account is exactly true, it is troubling.
Think about the degree of social decay required—especially within Christianity—for a Christian wife to be so conditioned by popular culture that she immediately congratulates her husband for abandoning her and their children, rather than reaching out for help to preserve their marriage and family.